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Pain

It pains me so bad to see people I love get hurt. What is even more painful is the fact that much as I would like to take their pain away, all I could do is listen and offer moral support.

One of the most important women in my life is confronted with marital issues. She managed to keep everything to herself for almost a decade thinking and believing that things would eventually be alright. Regrettably, things have become worse and are even turning worst as she recently shared.

I admire her for having so much love to give. I hate her for not loving herself enough to allow such things to happen. I resent the fact that without restraint, she gave up the life she used to enjoy for the man she married. She gave up the life, which made her who she really is. She even let relationships with good friends die out.

It was such a shock for me to see her fall apart. My heart literally ached as I listened to her share the emotions she had kept to herself for so long. I truly wish I could crush her pain away, but I can't. So I pray and I pray hard for the Lord to help her heal her wounds fast.

As I reflect on all that I've heard, I could not help but ask myself what I did to deserve all that I have....

Watch Him Sleep

Having a baby is absolutely wonderful. To us, parents, sometimes it becomes impossible to stop staring at our child specially because we do not want to miss any of his firsts.

There's just so much about our baby that never fails to put a smile on mine and his Dad's faces.

Enjoy wathing him sleep...

"Goodnight, Jacob. Goodnight, Jacob. It's time to go to bed."

Ethan Jacob Rafael, 4 days old. In absolute serenity.

Up close with the little man.

Morning baths make him sleepy.

... and so does afternoon baths.

Playing with Barney sometimes gets him exhausted.

With the pillow he holds so dearly.

Who can do push-ups while sleeping better than this little man?

Butt up high. Reminds me of my late uncle Tolits' fave sleeping position.

Too tired? The party's just starting, baby....

Our loving Dad took this picture one Saturday bonding afternoon.

Mommy's not going anywhere, Honey!

Welcome Back Home!

Joice, my former roomate in our humble apartment in Makati is back in Manila for a 3 week vacation with her husband Juan and their 2-year old son AJ.

The same night she flew in, we went out to dinner with friends Liza, Ryan and Rheena to let her enjoy "Ginataang Kuhol", which is one of her favorite dishes. Right after dinner we headed to Zircoh, a comedy bar in Quezon City where we had such a great time. And for the first time since I got pregnant in 2005, I stayed out later than midnight.

Of course she had something special wrapped for each of her friends. And who can say no to such goodies?!

Joice, who is better known to us, her friends from Innodata as "Bading" is one of the most thoughtful friends I have. We were officemates for 2 years before becoming roomates in a humble apartment in Makati. A place where we hardly saw each other for the reason that, when in the apartment we would normally be in the confines of our respective bedrooms (mine in the 2nd floor and hers on the 3rd) resting from one tiring full night's office shift after another. Apparently then, our supposed kitchen/dining, which was a common area didn't have much movement. Not for anything but it wasn't a condusive place for cooking/dining. Nevertheless, we sure had our share of good laughs, "girlie kikay" times, a few trips and some emo moments together.

My Little Brother Dennis

Four years ago, my youngest brother and I had a little misunderstanding when he decided to quit the Marine Academy where he (out of the tens of thousands who tried) was successfully admitted as a scholar. Back then, it was really hard for me to accept that he reluctantly let go of what I thought was a great opportunity for him to make his life far better than most.

Apparently, now, we have no way of knowing what could have been had he endured the pains of staying in the academy. Then again, I must say I really am very thankful that things went as they did. Looking back at those years, I realized a lot of reasons to thank God that He did not allow my beloved brother to be away from my parents and have very limited vacation days to spend with the family. Without him, our happy times wouldn't have been as happy; we might not have been able to weather our storms as greatly as we did.

The whole realization hit me big. I guess my only excuse for feeling as bad as I did then is that I am only human... I make mistakes. I should have known better, though. God has wonderful plans for each of His children.

"Sorry, but these are the only accessible photos I have of Dennis. With him in both pictures is my little boy."

My brother Pampam (as we call him) sure made our whole family proud again. A few days ago, he graduated with a degree in Computer Science, a last minute choice he made after setting the academy aside. He bested a couple of hundred other students and brought home the "Programmer of the Year" award. I truly believe that it's an excellent choice he made for himself as i've personally witnessed how he never gave up despite his very limited resources. Somehow, I feel that our misunderstanding a few years back served him well. Perhaps, he took it as a challenge to do well in school.

Job quest has officially started for him. We are very happy to see how he is so persistently trying to get himself employed in a good company. We pray hard that he continues to make good choices in life. With God's grace I am certain that he would do great in his chosen career.

Kudos to DFA!

It was back in 2002 when I went to the Department of Foreign Affairs on official business for the first time. Five years later, I came back to renew my passport and was pleased to see that a government unit can make a notable improvement. Of course, things can be so much better than they already are. Nonetheless, it feels good to note that at least one of the many government agencies that most of us, taxpayers frequent tries to step up.

Somehow the experience made me ease up a little on the thought that government offices here in the Philippines are hopelessly sloppy, thus, unworthy of the funds received from taxpayers.

Some significant observations:

Then and now,

• As early as 4:00 AM, people would be lined up in front of the 1st gate at the side entrance waiting for application forms to be given out. The lucky ones who already have the forms printed out from the web http://www.dfa.gov.ph/consular/passportapplicationform.pdf, photocopied from friends or received from the previous day’s visit to DFA would be lined up at the 2nd gate for step 1 (initial screening of requirements).
  
  Not much people flood gate 1 and those who are in attendance aren’t there for the forms, but to have their bags and requirements inspected before getting in.
  
  
• The 1st gate, being open to all would have applicants, fixers, vendors, beggars, pick-pockets, parked vehicles, stray dogs and oblivious security guards next to each other.
  
  Candy wrappers, pieces of paper, misplaced belongings and other sorts of trash would be scattered. It’s a perfect eyesore to add to the stressful environment.
  
  Only those with official business are allowed to enter. Not even friends or relatives of applicants, unless otherwise necessary.
  
  The place is acceptably clean.
  
  
• DFA employees would act as if they are unapproachable gods and goddesses who do passport applicants a great deal of favor of processing their papers, when as a matter of fact, these people are the ones who put food on their tables – taxpayers, they are.
  
  Staff would engage themselves into “small talks” while their clients wait in almost endless lines.
  
  Most of the employees appeared genuinely helpful. They seem mindful enough of their own businesses and are conscious of the fact that a great number of taxpayers are waiting to be served.
  
  
• People who personally process their applications would have no other choice but to come back or send a representative on a DFA specified date and time to claim their passports.
  
  Delivery option via a reputable courier group is available for a fee making it so much easier for those who wish to avail of such service.

Again, things can be a lot better than they already are. Nonetheless, I say KUDOS to DFA!

Gone Astray

Why??? How??? These questions I asked myself after realizing that I inadvertently misplaced our car key.

Ridiculous, yes it is! I can’t begin to imagine what really happened. All I remember is that I parked the car, took the key from the keyhole, phoned my partner, took my bag, got out of the car, pressed the auto-lock button then securely closed the door. Roughly 3 to 4 meters away from my parking space, I thought of keeping the car key inside my pocket for security – and the brain draining search began.

Call it misfortune, stupidity, heedlessness! Whatever it is, I take responsibility for what happened. Apparently though, our car key is irrecoverably gone for good. I’m sorry, baby.

Ethan Jacob

Our super sleepy 6-month old son Ethan Jacob. His dad says he looks like the babies of the famous "Pugad Baboy" series in this photo, with chubby cheeks and all. (lol)
Ever since he came into our lives (my partner and I), he has become our obsession. Our worlds literally rotate around his now. All that we do, we do for him. Our plans and goals in life became more clearly set the moment we learned of him. Things we thought we couldn't possibly do have become second nature to us. Best of all, having him lead us even closer to GOD.

We cannot say that what we have is perfect, but we are definitely very happy and content.

Car Care Day

My younger brother agreed to drive for me earlier today, our car care day. He said yes, not because he was concerned that I was not familiar with the surplus area in Banawe, the place I had to visit, but because I had to have my 6-month old son with me (despite all the errands) the entire day. There was just no one to leave him with. Besides, I really want to spend as much time with him as possible. Good thing Tito loves his nephew so dearly. :-)

Our ride there was fairly fine, except for a few wrong turns and the burning heat of the sun – which was okay because we got exactly what we went there for anyway – the “high-tension wires”, a few pieces of rubber tubes and nozzles, which cost us P2,920, plus a whopping P150 for installation. Mind you, I could have easily done it myself had I known that there wouldn't be tests of whatever sort to be done after. Come to think of it, I did ask so many questions and the shop owner was accomodating enough to answer them all. So, in a way it was like paying someone for a 20-minute “auto-mechanic for dummy” course. *wink*

Anyway, after the long drive to and from Banawe, we went to Saturn Autospec at C. Raymundo Street in Pasig for a scheduled change oil. It was actually our first time to get our engine oil changed outside of Petron/Caltex. If it hadn’t been for quite a number of endorsements from our fellow Toyota car owner friends at www.grupotoyota.com.ph we would have stayed skeptic about the P899 change oil and ‘the works’.

Whalah! After 2 and ½ hours, a bottle of water and my son’s complete afternoon nap, our car was finally out for our final inspection. WOW! Boy, we have never seen our car that clean and dazzling! Our engine bay doesn’t look in any way like before, cleanliness-wise. Whoever invented engine detailing is a genius!

P899 change oil – All-in promo, includes the following:
Mobil 1 Oil
Oil Filter
Car Wash
Vacuum
Tire Black
Engine Detailing
Bottled Water/Softdrink

Obviously, we are a very satisfied customer. Right after inspecting the car, I informed some friends about the experience and told them how happy we are with Saturn’s Change Oil service. You might want to try it too!





My little one at the Saturn Auto Shop lobby, after his afternoon nap.

So much for that...despite the day's accomplishments, it was still a dreadfully tiring experience for me. Imagine how much more for this cute little baby. Then again, he doesn't look tired at all, does he? :-)

My First Blog Entry

I was chatting with my good friend Ellaine -- who’s blog I just read http://llainey.blogspot.com, when I realized that blogging is a good way to update friends you don’t see much about anything. I told her I was going to think about it some more, but the truth is, I’m already writing my first entry while still with her at “YM”.

What do people get out of blogging anyway? A lot, i figured! It's an outlet - a site where people could pour out emotions. A source of information, which people who are willing to continuously learn crave for. A constant link to great friends with great minds....

Thanks, llainey. You have successfully recruited me! :-)